Ma! Come quick! Freddie's on the cover of Rolling Stone!

RS: Freddie, thank you for joining us. How are you today?
KF: 6
RS: Out of ten?
KF: No, just 6. If anything, out of 6.
RS: Right… I’ll start by asking you: why do your friends call you ‘King Freddie’?
KF: Because I’m the king!
RS: Is your real name Freddie King?
KF: No. I don’t have a real name.
RS: That doesn’t make sense.
KF: I hereby proclaim that it does!
RS: But isn’t it true that you’re NOT really a king at all? Wasn’t this just a title you claimed for yourself?
KF: Hey! I may be self proclaimed, but I’m still the king!
RS: …and you have your faithful ‘Knights of Quip’?
KF: I am their King, they are my knights.
RS: So you have actually assigned titles to members of the public, your friends, and they have actually accepted a title you have created? They actually walk around, telling people they are your knights? Are they insane? Are they complete losers? Have they no self esteem or concept of personal respect or pride?
KF: They are my knights. I gave them knighthoods for my kingdom; the Kingdom of Quip. Yes they have accepted the titles. It is a great honour to be given a Knighthood!RS: Yes… well a real one certainly would be…
KF: Do you want me to summon my executioner?!RS: Moving along… Just what is the story of the knights? How did they come about?
KF: I am on a mission to find 6 Knights; 6 men worthy of the title of Quip. 6 funny men. 6 harsh men. 6 bold and courageous men to cut through the boring monotony of life with smart-arse observations. At the moment there are 4 Knights, and one disgraced, banished for the betrayal of his oath.
RS: What is so important about the number 6?
KF: It’s one more than 5…
RS: It’s also an upside-down 9..
KF: Actually, I think you’ll find a 9 is an upside-down 6…
RS: You’re weird.
KF: I’ll take that as a compliment.
RS: One last question, before we finish up. If not now, when?
KF: Thursday.